El Pollo Loco

In case you are a racist, “el pollo loco” means “the crazy chicken”. El Pollo Loco is a restaurant in San Antonio, and I think that’s funny. According to Francine, “the prices at El Pollo Loco are loco”. She told me that if you buy eight hunks of chicken, they will give you a whole additional chicken at no additional cost! When it comes to chicken bargains I think you’d have a hard time beating that. So let me recommend El Pollo Loco if you’re in the mood for a free bonus chicken.

In Garland, there is a place called “Pollo’s Mexican Grill and Chicken For All”. That translates to “Chicken’s Mexican Grill and Chicken For All”. There is also a place called “Tattoos and Beanie Babies”. In Memphis there is a restaurant called “Breakfast, Lunch, and Hamburger” and it’s located next to a grocery store called “Cost Plus” (why would anyone want to pay the “plus”?).

In Indiana there is a Chinese carry-out place owned by some genuine Chinese people called – and I’m not making this up – “You-A-Carry-Out-A”. If you don’t get “You-A-Carry-Out-A” say it in the way that some people mimic Chinese voices.

I like things that look funny or that have funny names. When I was small, my friend David and I lived in a neighborhood full of ridiculous basketball goals. We’d spend our summers creeping around in alleys taking pictures of horrible baskets and running away. There was one that was nothing more than a rim on a pole (no backboard). Another had an eight inch two by four that served as the backboard. And at the Bisby Park were a couple of goals with aluminum backboards and double rims. Horrible!

Besides taking pictures of bad baskets, we would take pictures of poorly decorated houses at Christmas time. I wonder if any of you would be interested in buying a coffee table book that I have in mind. It would be called something like “Awful Christmas Decorations”. It would feature beautiful pictures of poorly decorated homes complete with captions describing where the families went wrong. As a sort of trial, perhaps next Christmas I’ll put some examples of what I’m talking about here at http://larryfeathers.blogspot.com.

In other merchandising news, I’m thinking of manufacturing some Larry Feathers t-shirts and pants for sale at reasonable prices to people who like reading about these adventures. If you’re interested, will you please let me know? Thanks.

Well, I’m done smoking. I think instead of smoking, my new vice is going to be chicken. In fact, consider this my pledge to replace beef and cigars with chicken and turkey, respectively. There are many obvious advantages to this plan, and I am asking for your support!

Now then, let me take this opportunity to congratulate some different people whose prospective marriages get my useless seal of approval. Congratulations to Stephanie and Ian who are going to get married together! These are two nice people who like taking me out for cheeseburgers when I’m in Houston. Also, congratulations to Nikki and Jeremy. Nikki is first rate, and, while I don’t know him, Jeremy must be pretty good too if Nikki agreed to become married to him. So come on and wish these people the best as they enter marriage! And, if I’m fortunate enough to be invited to your weddings, let me apologize in advance for not participating in the dancing. My legs hurt from injuries.